Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Prodigal Friend

Sometimes in life you make the stupidest decisions, and implement them without thinking about it.
You just feel hurt and you want to hurt someone so bad.
In the end its not only them that suffers, but you do too.

A few months ago, in a fit of jealous rage, you ostracize your best friend.
Not Di, the other best friend.

You just wanted him to feel what its like being avoided.
You should have given him some space or just talked to him about it.
Then again, you are not known for making the perfect decisions.

Then comes the slow burning reminders.
If you shared your life, your whole life with someone over a few years, its natural that everyday brings something that reminds you of them.

The Christmas with out a drunken mate.
An IPL auction.
Advices you terribly seek from no one but him.
Gossips you itch to share.
A movie he was urging you to see. (Inception)
Songs, habits, smoking.

You want to take back the deed.
But sometimes you want something so bad, doesn't mean its possible.

Your hands itch to make a step.
But you don't.
Like they say, pride comes before pain.

But you know, when it grows too much, you have to bite the bullet and face the consequences.
Good or bad or incredibly ugly.

Finally, you cant take it anymore.
Whats the worse?
He wont talk to you. How is that worse from the current situation?

An sms.
No reply.
Okay, that's settled then.
You can sigh and move on.

48 hours.
Sorry Miss. Smalltown girl, replying late.

Oh god.
You cant stop grinning.

Yahoo Messenger.
Old times.

I was ready to go on bended knees.
Thank god he is no meanie.
I would really look weird on my knees before the computer.

Nothing is changed.
Or everything is, for the better.
Na, nothing is changed, for better or worse.

Thank God.
And after 10 days, on 11-1-11, you feel like its a New Year

PS: Ooh, and he is fat now! That's like a dedicated new year gift.
Rudra, don't dump me over this now :-/


purple moonbeam said...

It's amazing how much I can relate to this. It's like every single thought and emotion recorded here (besides the incidents reminding you of course) is the same that has passed through me.
Only difference is it's not all right again with us and it looks like the old times will stay in the past, never to be relived except in solitary contemplation.
Glad all was forgiven :) Don't make the same mistake again!

Rudra said...

At least am not abused again :P

Ps: Nothing has ever changed,and never will.

Rajlakshmi said...

aww glad that everything settled down :D
so since your new year started late- happy new year again :P

DrEaMy PrInCeSs said...

entirely relateable. :)

Anjana said...

I can sooo relate to this. But things have changed, a hell lot. What is left now are memories, regrets and spoken words which cannot be taken back. The only thng I pray is for it to get better, if not like the past. I am sure God has listened enough to know how much I care. So I leave it all to Him.

Anyway, happy new year.. :)

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