Steps to take while smoking a cigar.
· Get a cigar first
a. Don't go to shops you know.
b. Don't nick from people who keep count.
· Find a lonely but comfortable place.
· Don't forget to carry a lighter.
· Don't take the first drag too deep.
· You might cough. Relax.
· Don't do fancy stuff at first.
· After doing it, dispose evidence, go back to your life, and don't tell anyone.
Well. This was the general plan. I suck at plans.
The first step was the easiest.
Dad smokes and its easy to nick from him. I was running around in morning chores when i saw an abandoned cigar and decided that its time i smoked one.
So i took it, grabbed a matchbox, ( where is the sophisticated lighter when i need o
ne!) and took off to my parents' room. Open doors. Well, i was lazy to climb to my room. I just came down. And my parents know i am crazy.
I sat down in peace, lighted it. Took a shallow drag.
How Did it Went:
·Its not so awesome. Its not an instant high(like pot, which i have not tried, yet ;) ), its not tasty like wine( which i love), its not comforting as food. Actually i don't know why people smoke. I will get to it later.
·Watching smoke coming out of your nose is cool. I saw it in mirror, and promptly started laughing like a hyena. Doubted for a sec if it was indeed pot.
·It burns you somewhere in pharynx. Intense and not in a good way. Made me think of smoke inhalations. Well, i was inhaling willingly, cant complain.
·I did not cough. If its my very unshakable lungs or careful maneuvering, i don't know. I like to think its the former.
·I was thinking, i am so going to blog about this, and then was not paying much attention to the butt in my hand, except occasional drags. so it stopped burring around the last 1/3rd. I didn't bothered to light it a second time.
I am probably going to sound like a very prude person or a very unadventurous one, but i think i am never going to smoke again. Its not because of the health risks. I am obese, if i had any thoughts on health, i won't be.
Its just, I didn't get why people smoke. Like i said, no high, no pleasure, no comfort! Just burning in nose and the smell of smoke. I guess its them boring people who just do it for the sake of doing something gets stuck with it as a habit. I am too lazy for habits.
So i classify it as a waste endeavour and is going to move on with poise.
After i disposed the butt, i waltzed into kitchen and announced, " Well, i didn't think i was going to do that!"
Me: I am not telling.
Mom: *Skeptical look*
Me: phew *blowing at mom's face*
Mom: You smoked???!!!
Me: Yeah, i tried.
Mom: Krishna!( thats not my name, its the god's name, clearly in vain) What is with you kid??
Me: I just smoked, i am not going to again, because its awful! Isn't that great news? Blah blah blah( this constitutes of all the things in said earlier)...
Me: Dad, it burns behind nose when smoking! WHy you even do that!!
Dad: Well, for beginners it might. Not for me anymore!
Dad: You smoked?
Me: Yeah. Its awful.
Note to my future kids:
If you are reading this, i want to tell you a few things.
1. Notice that i didn't smoked till i was almost 28. I will give you one year lax. If i caught you with a cig before 27, i am going to be really angry.
2. I did it once, so if i caught you twice, you have an entire different thing coming. I dont care if you are a biker chick or a scientific reasercher on the advantages of smoking.
3. You can not use this as a leverage against me. Well, not more than once.
So what's next?
Wouldn't you like to know. :P