Sunday, July 19, 2009

In smalltown girl's life....

Its been long since i have written about my life. So a very unorganized and not so thorough but rather boring attempt at that..

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I am working. AT LAST!!
New place, new people, new responsibilities... but sadly, staying at my parents' home makes it all less exciting.
Mom was pestering me about job since i finished studies. I don't blame her. We are not exactly Ambani or Mittal material. But some exams were making it damn hard for me to start. This lead to a lot of clashes. Between me and everyone i hold dear. So i was naturally looking for something that will take me away from the resentment. For someone who had only seen home during vacations since 11, i hoped it would be the easiest thing ever. How wrong i was!
Final line is, in younger days, when even i wished i was home, i couldn't be here and now, when i wish to be away, i just cant get out.

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I tried a lot to find what i want out of life. Still haven't landed an answer. Marriage, kids etc is what is happening with every one i know. Somehow it doesn't appeal to me much. succumbing to an arranged marriage is what Indian girls from small towns do. But not every one of them think alcohol is cool or do crazy social networking or think that gay rights should be preserved.
This makes me think that it was a bad idea to think out of the box. If your fate is confined in a box, the best think is ignoring everything outside the box and get accustomed to the life in box, however ridiculous that might be. Or be prepared to be disappointed and destroyed.

But i cant change who i am. And i don't plan to. And i am prepared.

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I gave up on love.
That is the only thing i have came to a conclusion in my life. Its not happening. So stopped wondering about it. That is a huge relief.

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I am madly in love with social networking. Its the best fun ever. Though i am glad that my college years were not spent in long hours of orkutting or tweeting from class. Every second of those years, i was there, my friends were there. Or i would have missed chunks of memories. And i am a bit sorry for those who don't realise what they are missing out on. Go out and enjoy life too. However precious FB/orkut is.

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We are under the rain attack. Rain Gods seems to be extremely pleased. A might less would have been appreciated. Its flooding here beyond limits. Clothes retain moisture, am wearing sweater(i happen to live near the tropical line), wet umbrella following me everywhere and rocky smelling like...well, dog. Its tad difficult to love rain in these circumstances. But i manage. :)

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Nothing more.
Au revoir!

4 comments:

Toon Indian said...

came here through the twitter handle..really nice blog will be visiting more often!!

Karan said...

Hey, Landed here through a friends blogroll ...
Nice post and interesting profile description/about me.

And Yes, everybody around me too is marrying, I hope i dont do it because of peer pressure :)

chembz said...

its always a fact of live that wen yu have somethin it is not wat yu'd actually like to have.. yu wanna have de other.. but wen yu have de other yu'ld like to have de ol one.. thats jus de way life works.. even if wat yu have is perfect for yu yu want de other.. and in a way dat is why ppl live.. a hope dat one day, i may attain it...

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" If your fate is confined in a box, the best think is ignoring everything outside the box and get accustomed to the life in box, however ridiculous that might be. Or be prepared to be disappointed and destroyed "


now i don agree wid dat.... first of all our fate depends on our actions.. basically we make it.. so unless u decide yu wanna spend ur life inside de box u can do anythin yu wish too.. and thinkin outside de box.. well aint dat y we are humans?? to think ??

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love aint somethin yu wait for and a day it arrives.. naaa.. it might happen unexpectedly a day.. wen it was de last thing yu had on ur mind.. don wait for it.. it'll come to find ya.. believe me.. but don question me cos i believe in its opposite.. :P

Nikita said...

I am sure fate has a beautiful surprise package in store for you. Just wait and do your thing, and one fine day the package will pop open before you in all its glory. Oh I am all for story-book romance!!
Don't know how to put it, but this morning after reading your post, I have this strong feeling about a stranger I have never met, that fate indeed has something wonderful planned for her :)